RANDOM AWESOME: New York, They've Got You Covered

As I have often remarked since moving here over a year ago, New York City makes a great effort to entertain and occupy its masses. Never have I attended so many free events with open bars, all varieties of swag (free stuff), and amazing bands and artists that I would actually pay to see (and I'm pretty cheap so that's saying quite a bit). Anyway, there are few forms of entertainment that are at their core free---and you would think sex is one of them. Sadly, with the rising cost of healthcare, even that is no longer free. But wait, here comes New York City rushing to save the day! The New York City Health department has taken a step beyond all the other promiscuous big cities and branded their own free condom. The new, dare I say hipper condom was unveiled on Valentine's Day (also National Condom Day) at the Kenneth Cole store in Rockefeller center. The repackaged LifeStyles lubricated condoms features flashy black foil packets emblazoned with colorful motifs of Subway lines. I could make many an amusing quip about subway sex but it's just too easy. Why not just visit NYC Condom and find out where to get some? The NYC Condom is available all over the city at bars, hair salons, restaurants, city buildings and cafes. And did I mention that they are free? Not keeping it in your pants has never been so easy.

PARTIES: Yo Majesty Graces Bushwick with their Royal Presence

So my first and only experience with Yo Majesty was at an “Ultimate Mega Loft Party” in a converted warehouse in Bushwick and I think I was either too drunk or just drunk enough to appreciate it. This tough girl trio from Tampa started out with "Club Action" a rump shakin club banger that got everyone going. Once Jewel of Yo Majesty started stripping (her signature move) and the Day-Glo necklaces came out I blanked out a bit, but I know the party was awesome.
Unlike most female rappers these days, of which there are few, Yo Majesty relies on bold machismo and grab-your-dick bravado worthy of a crew of construction workers from South Philly. With their wife-beaters, dreads and shades these girls spit rhymes so quick the only words I can remember from Club Action are "club action", but the beat is stuck in my brain.
I've never claimed to be a music aficionado, quite the opposite, so I'll leave the real reviews to those in the know...I copped this from an LA Weekly review Yo Majesty posted on their MySpace, and I find it to be pretty spot on...

"'Daaaamn!' That's all we can say when we listen to the rap riot that is Yo Majesty, three freaky Florida femmes with rhymes spicier than Salt -N-Pepa and bombastic beats that'd make J.J. Fad proud (eat your humps out, Fergie). This old-school girl trio may be naughty — check out the choppy synth bobs and bossy braggadocio of "Kryptonite Pussy" and "Hustle Mode" — but the fierce delivery makes it come off fresh, never forced." - LA Weekly

RANDOM AWESOME: Jay-Z Renews Former Career as Coke Pusher

Jay-Z's label Rocawear has been commissioned to re-design the Cherry Coke and Cherry Coke Zero cans. As part of the deal with Coca-Cola, Jay-Z is also involved in writing commercial jingles and unveiled the new Cherry Coke can during fashion week in February. Now, I don't really care if Jay-Z chooses to whore himself out commercially as much as possible---the man is trying to become a member of the Knowles family. I am excited about Cherry Coke Zero though...